Pregnancy Pressure

Hello Everyone, 

I hope you're all having a fantastic weekend. I have been asking for blog post requests over on my Instagram page recently to find out what it really is that you all love to read about. 

I have had a lot of requests from my skincare routine to my haircare routine and product reviews galore but one thing that I was asked on numerous occasions really stood out. 

"What did you do to maintain you glow during pregnancy and how did you keep yourself in shape?"

Now I'm not quite sure what "in shape" people are referring to, as when I was pregnant the only shape I felt I resembled was a VERY LARGE ball. I have had these questions quiet a few times and I am flattered, however, I think if I am completely honest with you pictures like the one above only resemble how I looked for roughly 10% of my pregnancy, if that. The rest of the time I was in very ill fitting old t-shirts and leggings with my hair in a messy bun and feeling sorry for myself and yes I even went to work like this (people who work with me will reassure you this is completely out of character but I was there and I worked my big ol tush off). 

I did not have the easiest pregnancy (although I am very! very! aware of how lucky I was to be able to carry my daughter) it was still f**king hard, there I said it, yes I am that person. I suffered severely with morning sickness and then to add to that I went on to have my stomach ripped open with a case of Diastatis Recti, and the whole time I was going through this I was thinking, why am I not one of those mums who is naturally glowing and taking every step in her stride. I was comparing myself to these other women on social media and you guys have been asking me questions as if I was one of the women who glowed naturally and took it all in my stride. 

I realise now exactly why you thought that, I didn't share the times that I struggled or times that were hard and I didn't want to feel like I was failing in comparison to others, therefore pictures we closely vetted and I honestly didn't post that many pictures when I was pregnant, I didn't even take that many if I'm honest which upon reflection I regret. 

Also, of the few pictures I did take there aren't that many where I felt I looked great and that's because when you have spent all morning / afternoon / evening wrapped around a toilet you just don't feel fantastic in all honesty and a selfie is the last thing on your mind, and if we're honest, most of us only really show the times that we feel great and look nice on our social media . I am now making a more conscious  effort to try to keep my content as real as possible because creating a false image of how easy (it's not) pregnancy and motherhood/parenthood can be will only put pressure on others to replicate that false image. 

I wanted to write this blog post to all pregnant women and the people who asked me the above question in order to give you a more truthful perspective. Some days you will feel brilliant and want to take your selfies but other day's you will feel totally sh*t and not yourself and this is wholeheartedly ok. You need to allow yourself to feel that way and stop putting so much pressure on yourself, your entire body is going through a huge change.

This should be the time of your life when you are taking the best care of yourself. 

That doesn't mean you need to look your best! It means that if you're having a low day, allow yourself some time to relax and make sure you have someone at home and at work that you can vent to. It means you should be cutting yourself some slack if you don't look like you just stepped out this months pregnancy style section on ASOS, because really it doesn't matter what clothes you are wearing they will not fit you soon anyway and no one is worried about what you are wearing if you are struggling, they just want to focus on you and your baby. 

I would encourage you to share your stories of how you have struggled and how you have overcome things as this sharing is going to allow others to see that perfection during pregnancy is not what matters. We put far too much pressure on ourselves as Women and Mum's to achieve perfection that we forget the most important thing is to look after our wellbeing and that means doing what feels best for you. 

Lots of people asked me my workout routine during pregnancy and whilst I walked a lot and am on my feet quite a bit at work, I did not have a work out routine. Yes you read correctly, I did not have one and I concisely knew I didn't want one. I had put so much pressure on my body in previous years, striving for physical perfection that I thought, do you know what, growing and entire human is workout enough for me at this moment in time and I am happy to forgo 12 months in the gym. 

Now, everyones experience will be completely different and you may still want to go to the gym and that's fine. What I am trying to say is make sure that you do not let the standards of others make you feel pressured or that you are not doing well enough or that you are not good enough, because you are doing brilliantly. There are more important things during pregnancy than to worry about than aiming for physical perfection or beauty, you just need to look after yourself and give yourself a little love and a little less stress. Worry a less about the glow and more about the self care and mental wellbeing, take some time for yourself now, soon you will have a little someone occupying all of that free time so make the most of it.

I hope this post has helped and given a little more of a realistic insight into my pregnancy and please feel free to share your experiences below. 

Jordan 

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